Youth counsellor – self esteem versus respect

Youth counsellor Steve Taylor talked to Larry Williams on Newstalk ZB about sexual behaviour relating to the ‘Roast Busters’ case. KIA commented on it at Kiwiblog:

The link to Larry Williams’ Newstalk ZB interview with Steve Taylor (the West Auckland youth councilor) was a breath of fresh air and loaded with common sense wisdom.

The interview: Steve Taylor: Roast Busters behaviour

This is a crisis of parenting and a decline in what could loosely be called societal collective morals. Things that were less widespread are now commonplace. A case in point is pornography. 20 years ago it was rare for teenage boys to have access to porn movies that portrayed predatory group sex as ok – now it is easy to access all kinds of porn.

It also used to be rarer for teen girls to get blind drunk – whereas teen male heavy drinking was commonplace.

Yes, that was my experience when I was a partying teen.

A generation ago there was less concern about self esteem and more concern about boundaries. My mother used to say semi – jokingly that our home was not a democracy but a benign dictatorship! Too many modern parents of teens are afraid to lay down boundaries with consequences. All these trends erode norms and make it harder for parents to find an appropriate boundary and enforce it.

The antics of these young men are outside even the modern norm of casual teen sex. Its one thing to get drunk and shag a girl you meet at a party – that is commonplace. These boys have systematically targeted younger teen girls to find ways to have group sex with them and using alcohol and drugs where possible to assist in their goal. That is predatory behaviour that, was an under aged victim able to lay a sufficiently robust complaint that would stand up in court, could result in rape charges.

This case will have prompted many parents to ponder.

Leave a comment


  1. Brown

     /  8th November 2013

    The problem with being a parent nowadays is that the State has decided it will do a variety of things that parents cannot question or review in any meaningful way and remove the rights of parents to deal effectively with much of the consequence. We are looking at the left lowering the age of consent and sex education at much lower levels than now. Teaching people things and expecting them to ignore it is stupid.

    It seems to me that much of the push for that is from the left’s gay wing who a desperate to be accepted and only have sexuality to offer as a point of difference. Real skills and ability are non sexual. Pink Floyd were right – “Leave the kids alone”.

  2. Good post Pete: I had wondered about the parents of these Busters and how others may feel their daughters may have been raped. Sad. I had an interesting discussion the other day with an elderly gentleman friend of mine and we both agreed that what is happening is not normal at all. This however is getting a lot of attention which is a very good thing but way too late maybe?

    Brown: It has absolutely nothing to do with QUOTE “Left’s gay wing” UNQUOTE.

    • Too late for many victims but not too late to reduce the number of victims in the future, so it’s important to speak out as much as possible and keep it going.


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