Fuck and run fathers and male irresponsibility

A comment on Sensible reaction from Little on Tolley/contraception raises some of the most important issues when it comes to at risk CYF kids and contraception.

I have worked on construction sites where the usual minimum wage day labourer sorts brag about the number of females they got pregnant. One had 4 kids to 3 females and was very proud of that.

Thats a lot of low quality sperm getting sprayed everywhere and fertilising equally low quality eggs and its the tax payer that will be paying over and over for it as the low IQ progeny work their way through the welfare, education and justice system.

It has to stop.

For every women (or girl) who has a baby who is born into an at risk family/lack of family situation there is also a father (I doubt that many of these kids are the result of artificial insemination or immaculate conception).

It’s known that it’s common in the problem demographics for struggling or incompetent mothers to have multiple fathers of their children.

Not all multiple father families are a problem, far from it.

But irresponsible father families – or no responsibility father families – are a major part of the problem, from fuck and run fathers to those who can’t cope and move on.

Why is it common for males to actively have sex knowing it may result on offspring that they have little or no intention of taking any financial or parenting responsibility for?

Like drink driving forty years ago it is probably seen as a joke by some, and an achievement by others.

But the victims are many, and they include the mothers who get pressured or conned into having unprotected sex, but most importantly the victims are the many kids born into hopeless situations because they have hopeless fathers.

This is a substantial systemic male problem.

So this needs male leadership. Not the easy male leadership in politics, business and sport.

It’s very difficult leadership that’s required, both because it’s a difficult issue, and because males seem to have difficulty in taking joint responsibility for male problems.

Many males are either a part of or do nothing about masculine culture irresponsibility when it comes to contraception and fatherhood.

How about it male political leaders? Who is willing to to stand up and confront the fuck and run father mentality?

John Key?
Andrew Little?
Winston Peters?
James Shaw?
Te Ururoa Flavell?Peter Dunne?
David Seymour?

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21 Comments

  1. Eats, roots, shoots & leaves

     /  30th September 2015

    It’s not just a Kiwi thing.

    Reply
    • No. But it’s a significant problem in New Zealand.

      Reply
    • traveller

       /  30th September 2015

      Apart from certain states in the USA we have the worst teen pregnancy rate in the OECD

      Reply
      • kittycatkin

         /  30th September 2015

        That seems to depend upon who is putting the figures out-I have seen so many contradictory ones that I don’t know what to believe. America does seem to have far more than anyone else, but apart from that, which does seem to be consistent, the numbers vary enormously. It’s most annoying. I

        Reply
  2. traveller

     /  30th September 2015

    None of the above!

    The problem needs to be addressed within the demographic it occurs. There is no demographic disapproval and there is no cost enough that could be regarded as a deterrent. There is no compulsion or reason for a mother to reveal the father’s identity or any broader societal pressure on them. Spreading their seed is the easiest, (any animal can do it) yet greatest achievement they’ll ever make. It’s simply part of a the wider problem of rights without responsibilities, entrenched welfarism and illiteracy and the liberal mindset that simultaneously excuses and lazily pays up to keep it all neatly wrapped up.
    It’s leaders and role models that have broken the cycle that need to act, but nobody yet has stuck their hands up to make a difference.

    Reply
    • I disagree. Th demographic it occurs in won’t change without peer (male) pressure from outside. They think it’s normal unless it’s made clear by others it’s not.

      Reply
      • traveller

         /  30th September 2015

        Sorry if not clear on that. Any change needs to be driven by male role models broadly from but risen above the demographic. Your Sonny Bills and your plethora of league player types.

        Reply
        • kittycatkin

           /  30th September 2015

          Females need to play their part. There are no babies made without the cooperation of both parents. I know there are a few as the result of rape and incest, but they are a small minority and we’re not talking about those. I knew a girl who had one by her father-when her mother died, S became a subsitute wife, and although no coercion was involved, that doesn’t clear daddy dear of blame.

          But as a general rule, a fuck and run father does it with a fuck and run to WINZ mother .

          And while the DPB is there for all comers, this situation won’t change.

          Reply
    • Mike C

       /  30th September 2015

      @Trav

      A very interesting point you have made about the women and teenage girls not having to name the father on the birth certificate … however the Government is expected to provide things like DPB and other forms of Welfare to put a roof over that child’s head and food in its mouth and clothes on its back.

      These “Fuck’n’Run” Fathers are not having any pressure put on them to provide for their children financially or socially by these “Baby Mamas”, and nor is the Government able to retrieve any money from any of these “Fuck-Fathers” in the form of Child Support being deducted from their wages, because these men are anonymous and not declared on the baby’s birth certificate.

      Perhaps a way to get these women and teenage girls to either start using reliable contraception or to name the father’s on the birth certificate, would be to refuse these women and teenage girls the right to receive the DPB until they name the man that fucked them 🙂

      If the easy cash-flow is cut off from the Governmental Golden Goose, then we might find that there is a dramatic drop in births from this particular demographic 🙂

      Reply
      • name the man…… or men……….. A national DNA database would suit, makes crime fighting easier, and on topic a simple blood test would pick daddy out of the 2 million or so males when the woman says “I cant remember”

        Reply
        • Mike C

           /  30th September 2015

          @Shane

          WOW !!!

          I never would have pegged you as being someone who would want a DNA Database. LOL.

          In this age of science and tech ability, it makes total sense to utilize that, and solve crimes quicker and get the male sperm donors found, so that they can have Child Support deducted from their wages 🙂

          Reply
          • I’m not a tinfoil hat Anti Big brother type, I would be concerned about full genome sequencing for everyone, It would certainly take the risk pooling out of health insurance for many. 😦 but yeah I reckon go for it.

            Reply
            • kittycatkin

               /  30th September 2015

              The cost would be prohibitive and the benefits probably wouldn’t justify it. It’s an insult to the majority of men who are decent and responsible.

            • kittycatkin

               /  30th September 2015

              I’m glad not to have been the only one who failed to notice that the DPB changed several years ago and is now run differently-though I expect that the career babymakers will be one step ahead of the changes. While the income goes up for each new child, and this is seen as a right, the situation will never change. There is a financial disincentive for not naming the father, but not a huge one.

            • kittycatkin

               /  30th September 2015

              And it hasn’t been called that for several years. What an observant lot we are 😦

  3. Male leadership in Parliament? Not in this intake. Hard to stand up when ones spine is made of sugar glass.

    Reply
  4. kittycatkin

     /  30th September 2015

    For every irresponsible man who has a one night stand, there’s a woman or girl who has one with him (unless he’s gay, in which case the problem of pregnancy doesn’t arise).

    The partner who could be literally left holding the baby is more responsible for making sure that it doesn’t happen, as she has more to lose.

    It’s also a sad fact of life that teenage fathers are likely to be edged out of the child’s life. A documentary that we saw about this years ago had the young fathers wanting to be part of the baby’s life and take care of it, but in many or maybe most cases they found themselves increasingly left out until they had no contact at all.

    Fathers of illegitimate babies have no real rights.

    They can’t force an abortion (and rightly so) but the mothers can abort the babies against their will (too bad if the father wants to let it live)

    Reply
  5. traveller

     /  30th September 2015

    The irony that today much of the talking heads of Aotearoa’s liberal population is now in favour of letting in Chris Brown. Talk about Damascian conversions. Turia, by her own admission said that nothing that she’d ever done in Parliament made a blind bit of difference to the biff and bash culture, so why not bring Chris out. Brown is solely interested in promoting himself and making a living. If he has to mouth a couple of platitudes and throw a few slogans at the odd concert to get a visa, so what. Turia must have rocks in her head to imagine this man could stop one beating when she’s overseen the squandering of 100s of millions to get not one negative stat changed whether it was teen pregnancies, women bashing, prison stats or literacy outcomes.

    Reply
    • jaspa

       /  30th September 2015

      Isn’t she infuriating?

      “I took some time to think about it. I decided it can only be good. I think all of us learn from our behaviours, good and bad. And it is a fact that he committed an offence, one that I feel quite strongly about. However I also believe in forgiveness, in redemption.”

      It is a shame the Maori people cannot extend this ‘forgiving’ attitude to their fellow countrymen.

      Reply
      • kittycatkin

         /  30th September 2015

        She is infuriating. Her description of Wanganui, which is where I grew up,at the time when I as there was that of a racist place where the police would take police dogs into schools to attack (Maori, needless to say) pupils who were or had been wagging. Too bad that the schools she named were ones that my mother was teaching at when all this was going on. It’s odd that she and a friend who also spent many years at one of the schools (and who was brought up in a town which was mainly Maori, speaks Maori fluently and has Maori friends and relations) failed to notice this. As did the press and everyone else in town.* There were so many distortions and outright lies in the article that I wrote to the paper to correct them-the town was unrecognisable. Among other things, she claimed that when she married, she was forced to resign as a nurse, because married women could not be nurses. What drivel.

        This is the woman who defended taggers because it was their way of making social commentary and an art form. Let’s all go and tag her place and see if she says that about us and doesn’t call the police and have us charged.

        *There wasn’t so little crime in the town even then that the police had nothing better to do than go after waggers with dogs. If this had happened, and it didn’t, it would hardly be a deterrent-who’d go to school if it meant being mauled by a police dog ? Even if the police would do this, what sort of school would call them in-and why did nobody ever say anything ?

        Reply

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