Name the merged media company

It was confirmed today that talks are under way of a possible merger between Fairfax and NZME, two of New Zealand’s largest media companies and in control of many of the country’s newspapers.

I have concerns about this if it goes ahead. Monopoly media is not good for news, analysis or democracy.

And there’s talk that the pay wall stand off between the two will disappear so news will be by subscription. That’s the choice of companies but it will reduce access to a major chunk of news.

But on the lighter side:

Best Fairfax [Stuff] and NZME media merger names via @caffeine_addict

  • FaxMe
  • F-Me
  • StuffMe

Some more:

  • Heruff
  • Stuffald

Any more?

UPDATE: Emmerson with a similar idea, put more graphically:

The one that didn’t pass the taste test – now ok’d by Ed for use here

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56 Comments

  1. Gezza

     /  11th May 2016

    Grotte.

    Reply
  2. Gezza

     /  11th May 2016

    Media Enterprises Herald.

    Reply
  3. Pantsdownbrown

     /  11th May 2016

    Smearfax

    Reply
  4. Pantsdownbrown

     /  11th May 2016

    Stuff all fax

    Reply
  5. patupaiarehe

     /  11th May 2016

    FauxfactsNZ 😀

    Reply
    • Gezza

       /  11th May 2016

      Early in the evening I know, but I’ve got five bucks on this one e hoa.

      Reply
    • PATUPAIAREHE: New factsNZ : In Māori tradition patupaiarehe, also known as tūrehu and pakepakehā, were fairy-like creatures of the forests and mountain tops. Although they had some human attributes, patupaiarehe were regarded not as people but as supernatural beings (he iwi atua). Pake pakeha? Darimana kamu? Mugkin dari langitnya!

      Reply
      • Drat mungkin bukan Mugkin, maaf sekali, ejaan yang buruk alasannya!!

        Reply
      • patupaiarehe

         /  11th May 2016

        Fairies??!! That there is the sort of rumour FauxfactsNZ would be proud of… 😉
        Good post on the other thread BTW, must be the nicest thing anyone has said about Mr Slater all day

        Reply
  6. patupaiarehe

     /  11th May 2016

    I much prefer this description BJ, cherry picked from Te Ara 😉

    What did they look like?
    Patupaiarehe had light skin and red or fair hair. They did not have tattoos. Some people said they were small, and others said they were a normal size. In Whanganui stories, patupaiarehe were giants.
    Where were they found?
    Patupaiarehe were seldom seen. They were thought to live in several places in the North Island, including in the Waikato, around Rotorua and in the Urewera mountains. They also lived in some places in the South Island.
    What were they like?
    Patupaiarehe were afraid of the light, and were only seen at twilight or in the mist. They wore mats and red flax clothes, and could sometimes be heard playing their flute.
    What happened when they met people?
    Sometimes patupaiarehe would put people under a spell and steal them away. They made love to beautiful women, and some people thought their children were the redheads called urukehu. To keep them away, people would paint themselves with smelly mixtures, or cook food, because patupaiarehe hated the smell. Fire and light would also frighten them away.
    Patupaiarehe sometimes taught people magical chants and other skills. They were good at fishing, and one chief spied on them to learn how to make nets

    http://teaohou.natlib.govt.nz/journals/teaohou/issue/Mao58TeA/c13.html

    Reply
    • Alan Wilkinson

       /  11th May 2016

      Reminds me of a family where we used to live called the possums – because they only came out at night.

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  12th May 2016

        I can’t now remember how many of a Maori family near us in Wanganui had fair hair, but if one hadn’t known that it was natural, one would have thought that the parents had dyed the children’s hair the oddest and most unnatural colour-it was a sort of dusty, pale yellow-brown. There’s a Maori man whom I know with hair that glints fiery red in the sun-it’s a very dark red by nature. Lucky sod. I have heard that this is prevalent somewhere-East Coast ?

        Reply
        • Pickled Possum

           /  12th May 2016

          Yes Miss the Coasties have red everything.
          Some beautiful red haired women up the Coast 😉

          Reply
    • Pickled Possum

       /  12th May 2016

      Patupaiarehe

      I was in te Urewera a few years back, I was walking to the little lake and took many photos. When I got a few printed, there in the shot of te ngahere was a person of white reddish colour and of little statue, this I call patupaiarehe. I ask most that look at the photo tell me what you see and most with te wairutanga pouring out of their body all say Patupaiarehe.
      Believe it or not.

      Reply
      • Pickled Possum

         /  12th May 2016

        awww all I want for xmas is an edit button … should be spelt *wairuAtanga*

        Reply
      • patupaiarehe

         /  12th May 2016
        Reply
        • Pickled Possum

           /  12th May 2016

          A long hair version of Putiputi
          wairuatanga – spirituality
          see you over OF for some music later???

          and for the new name of the merged media
          LIARS .. nah … how bout Forked Tongues then, no.
          then how bout Mixed Messages, oh well I give up
          MSM it is then
          MSM is an abbreviation of methylsulfonylmethane, an organic form of sulfur.
          sulfur … stinky stuff.

          Reply
  7. Kitty Catkin

     /  11th May 2016

    MUFFINZ

    FAIR E NUFF

    TUFF MEN(Z)

    FAX FAFF

    Reply
    • patupaiarehe

       /  11th May 2016

      I suspect Steve Crow already owns the rights to the first one Kitty 😉

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  12th May 2016

        I hope not-what on earth were YOU thinking of when you saw ‘muffin’ ?

        Reply
        • Kitty Catkin

           /  12th May 2016

          Remind me not to go into a cafe with YOU. Really !

          Reply
          • patupaiarehe

             /  12th May 2016

            😀

            Reply
            • patupaiarehe

               /  12th May 2016

              Reminds me of a funny story from a few years ago…..
              A new apprentice had just started, and it was his job to take our smoko orders. So he dutifully went around the factory, and all went well until he got to Charlie…..
              “Would you like anything from the shop Charlie?”
              “Yup, tell Dorothy that Charlie wants a furburger.”
              “Huh? What’s a furburger Charlie?”
              “Charlie wants a furburger boy!!! Here’s five bucks, now piss off!”
              So the poor boy did as he was told.
              Fifteen minutes later, he’s back. Charlie’s paper bag has a big smileyface drawn on it under his name, and a nice hot fishburger inside.
              The boy couldn’t understand why we thought it was so funny 😀

  8. Kitty Catkin

     /  11th May 2016

    TAXIFAIRE

    Reply
  9. Blazer

     /  11th May 2016

    Fuxfax.

    Reply
  10. Brown

     /  12th May 2016

    “Patupaiarehe were afraid of the light, and were only seen at twilight or in the mist. They wore mats and red flax clothes, …”

    Gracious, Marixist, ginger, Greenpeace supporting hemp wearers were about way back then!

    Reply
    • patupaiarehe

       /  12th May 2016

      Nope, just flax wearing gingas. Karl Marx wasn’t even a twinkle in his dad’s eye back then. 😛

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  13th May 2016

        It was YEARS before I understood what that saying meant-light finally dawned, the penny dropped…

        Reply
  11. Mike

     /  12th May 2016

    Ferald

    Reply
    • Alan Wilkinson

       /  12th May 2016

      Excellent, Mike. The Ferald sounds just right.

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  12th May 2016

        Everyone will be kicking themselves for not thinking of this one 😀

        Reply
        • Gezza

           /  12th May 2016

          No I’ll be kicking pp. I lost 5 bucks on his.

          Reply
          • patupaiarehe

             /  12th May 2016

            If you want to hold me responsible for your own bad choices G, I’ll happily hold my bum up to my screen, while you kick yours… 😀

            Reply
            • patupaiarehe

               /  12th May 2016

              And before you ask, no I don’t have a webcam 😀

            • Kitty Catkin

               /  13th May 2016

              It should be built into your PC, it is with mine, and mine’s a fairly basic model.

              And don’t think of downloading a perfect bum and passing it off as yours.

            • Gezza

               /  12th May 2016

              Just because I was too dumb to think of a better one than yours or other peoples is no excuse for you not to pp. 😛

              Evening e hoa. Will be heading across to OF for your music vids later.

            • patupaiarehe

               /  13th May 2016

              @Kitty
              I don’t buy computers, my son builds them. If I wanted a webcam, I’d go get one off him & plug it in. And if I were to upload my perfect bum, I’d have to shave it first, to do it justice… 😀 😉

            • Kitty Catkin

               /  13th May 2016

              Too much detail, thank you.

              I bet that you would be capable of finding a photo of the perfect rear end and saying that it’s yours-Gezza would never know 😀

            • Gezza

               /  13th May 2016

              That’s true. I’ve certainly got no other male bottoms in my database here to compare it to.

            • patupaiarehe

               /  13th May 2016

              @Kitty
              How rude of you to put such a slur on G’s good character. I can see why you keep getting ‘thumbed down’ ….. 😀

            • Kitty Catkin

               /  14th May 2016

              Well, he may know…that’s between the two of you ! 😀

            • Gezza

               /  14th May 2016

              Actually, come to think of it, I think I might have a photocopy of mine somewhere upstairs. That was some Christmas party.

            • Gezza

               /  14th May 2016

              Found it! No … hang on … I think that’s Alice’s … the Manager’s. That really was some Christmas party. 😎

            • Gezza

               /  14th May 2016

              Yeah, it is. She’s signed and dated it on the back and put a heart and two xx’s on it.

            • Kitty Catkin

               /  14th May 2016

              Lemme see…no, that says Andrew-I can’t make out the surname, but it starts with L…Lit…no, the rest is illegible. And it’s not signed on the back-well, it is, but not on the back of the paper, if you see what I mean. (blushes)

    • Kitty Catkin

       /  13th May 2016

      Well, my late husband used to say that the Herald might as well call itself The Daily Worker.

      Reply
    • Kitty Catkin

       /  13th May 2016

      MONOTONY

      Reply

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