‘This is how you raise a rapist’

Madeleine Holden at The Spinoff has a good look at the Brock Turner rape issue in the US in ‘This is how you raise a rapist’: on the culture which created Brock Turner

The statements of Stanford student athlete and rapist Brock Turner’s family and friends point to the poisoned atmosphere which helps prominent men believe they are entitled to rape, says Madeleine Holden. Trigger warning: this opinion piece addresses rape and sexual violence.

On January 17, 2015, Stanford student athlete Brock Turner raped an unconscious women behind a dumpster. In March this year, judge Aaron Persky handed down a six month sentence to Turner despite the maximum sentence of 14 years for three counts of sexual assault, saying that he thought “A prison sentence would have a severe impact on him… I think he will not be a danger to others.” This, in itself, isn’t news: rapists avoiding jail time for their crimes is nothing new, and it’s not unusual for young, white male athletes from prestigious universities to be treated leniently by their schools and the legal system.

Holden shows what initiated widespread interest in the case, the court statement of the victim, and then goes on to detail what sparked a furore.

In the face of widespread backlash about his sentence, Turner’s father issued a statement defending his son, arguing his life will be “deeply altered” by the court’s verdict and that “He will never be his happy-go-lucky self with that easygoing personality and welcoming smile.” Turner’s father went on to describe the worry, anxiety, fear and depression his son now faces, before stating that “His life will never be the one that he dreamt about and worked so hard to achieve. That is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action out of his 20 plus years of life.”

20 minutes of action. That’s how Brock Turner’s father described his son raping an unconscious young woman behind a dumpster. Action. As though it was harmless sexual fun – the kind young men are wont to seek out – and only 20 minutes of it, as if his son was cheated by having to face all these pesky consequences for a mere blip of a good time. That “good time,” of course, robbed Turner’s victim of her dignity and wellbeing and permanently altered the course of her life, too. The only difference is she had no say in it.

Mr Turner went on to say that his son should not be sent to jail because of his lack of prior offending, and also because “he has never been violent to anyone, including his actions on the night of January 17, 2015.”

Mr Turner’s comment here portrays a fundamental misunderstanding of rape. Rape is always violent, and it is always a violation. Turner’s victim was left with bruises inside her vagina and scratches and lacerations on her skin. Turner also left her with lasting feelings of despair, difficulty with trust, an inability to eat or sleep, depression, isolation, difficulty working, and continuing fear. Turner’s “actions” on the night of January 17, 2015 were violent, because that night, he raped someone. Rape is always violent.

Incredibly, Mr Turner went on to say that his son could become a role model for young people.

“Brock can do so many positive things as a contributor to society and is totally committed to educating other college age students about the dangers of alcohol consumption and sexual promiscuity,” he wrote. “By having people like Brock educate others on college campuses is how society can begin to break the cycle of binge drinking and its unfortunate results.”

It’s disheartening, to say the least, that Mr Turner thinks the problem here is alcohol consumption and sexual promiscuity, neither of which are the same thing as rape. The mention of drinking is a convenient scapegoat for Turner and his father, because they can point the finger at the victim, who was drinking – the implication being that she was partially to blame for her predicament, which she wasn’t. But the mention of “sexual promiscuity” is startling.

And it gets worse:

In case you think Turner’s father was a rogue influence in his life, his friend has come forward to blame the conviction on political correctness, and, bafflingly, said that “rape on campus isn’t always because people are rapists.”

“This is completely different from a woman getting kidnapped and raped as she is walking to her car in a parking lot,” she said. “That is a rapist. These are not rapists. These are idiot boys and girls having too much to drink and not being aware of their surroundings and having clouded judgement.”

Idiot boys, and girls. The implication is clear: idiots, these girls, for getting themselves raped because they drank too much; not like real victims, who are simply walking to their cars alone at night, before they’re whisked away by real rapists. Again, this statement betrays a severe misunderstanding of what rape is. Most survivors of rape are raped by people they know. Turner’s friend manages to stuff two damaging rape myths into one statement: the idea that women and girls contribute to their own rapes by drinking, and that rape that happens on college campuses or between acquaintances isn’t real, like stranger rape is.

This all illustrates a much wider problem.

Mr Turner believes disturbing things about rape, “promiscuity”, drinking and college culture. At the age of 19, his son raped an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. It is, of course, impossible to know why exactly Brock Turner became a rapist, but one thing is for sure: the attitudes held by his father – and many, many other people – about rape aren’t harmless or isolated; they directly feed into how young men decide to treat women.

If you’re not convinced, there’s mounting evidence. A survey of 379 college-aged men revealed that, of the athletes surveyed, more than half reported coercing a partner into sex. Furthermore, those who reported coercing partners into sex – that is, raping them – were more likely to believe in rape myths (“If a woman doesn’t fight back, it isn’t rape,” for example) and hold traditional views of gender roles such as “Women should worry less about their rights and more about becoming good wives and mothers.” In short, believing common, dangerous ideas about rape and women’s roles is more likely to mean that you are a rapist.

I don’t think that most men are rapists. Some men,  are, and because some of them are recidivist rapists it can appear as if there are many male rapists.

Holden illustrates more alarming public attitudes of some males and sex, including this from “one of hip hop’s most prolific stylists” (who faces multiple accusations of rape):

no choice.jpg-large

That’s a seriously sick attitude, on public display.

Holden concludes:

You don’t need to be a father to help raise a rapist. You only need to be an active participant in a culture that already treats rape alarmingly lightly. Rapists are around us, and they listen to jokes about rape and rape myths – ideas that women can dress or behave in ways that invite rape, that if they don’t fight and scream they must have “liked it”, that if they were drunk then they got what was coming to them – and they are fortified by them.

Real rapists are absorbing our cultural attitudes about rape, and then they are raping actual women. It’s not an academic exercise, and we have enough evidence to show that our dialogue around rape isn’t harmless or separate from the real world in which rape takes place. Perpetuating rape myths contributes towards a culture in which rape happens often and is punished little; a culture that believes, on some level, that men are bound to rape and women invite rape by acting in certain ways.

That is the real problem.

Now I happen think that a conviction and a 6 month prison sentence (out in 3) will have a major impact on Brock Turner. But relative to the offence it is a lenient sentence.

His ’20 minutes of action’ has had a profoundly damaging effect on the whole life of a woman.

At least his case has highlighted a serious issue. If a few men (‘man’ may not be a suitable description for people who think it’s ok to have sex with an unconscious stranger) like Turner get disproportionately punished (in comparison to past educated white offenders) then so be it.

This was a very sleazy sexual attack that deserves condemnation publicly and by the court.

And the only way of making it clear that the attitudes that contribute to this sort of offending have to change is by punishing offenders in a way that change the entrenched attitudes of people like Turner’s father and friend, and many other men and women

Including in New Zealand, where many attitudes to women and to sex and to rape are far appropriate.

I’m aware that some men get annoyed or offended by rape culture being mentioned. Many men are not rapists, many men do not promote cultures that excuse and in some ways encourage sexual assaults and inappropriate sexual attitudes and behaviours.

But this is one issue where remaining innocent silent is not enough. Good people, good men, should speak up more to make it clear to those who abuse and sexually assault and rape women – and men – that it is abhorrent behaviour that a modern society should not tolerate.

Change requires effort. Silence isn’t sufficient.

Leave a comment

51 Comments

  1. Alan Wilkinson

     /  9th June 2016

    A long rant is no more impressive than a short one. I don’t know the details of this case and won’t be passing judgement,on it. I leave that to the courts which heard the evidence and tested it. If a sentence is wrong it can be properly appealed.

    But I do know that I despise those who victimise people who hold differing opinions and dare to express them. Those who are trying to destroy this judge and the friend who supported the guy are certainly as vile as their targets.

    Reply
    • I don’t believe the judge or the friend should be ‘destroyed’ but that doesn’t mean issues about the sentence and the attitudes of people shouldn’t be raised and discussed.

      And I’ll also point out that sexual assaults and rape can have quite a destroying effect on the lives of victims.

      Saying nothing and accepting the status quo attitudes and sentences (that are quite unbalanced depending on who the offenders are) can contribute to the destroying of many people’s lives if nothing is addressed or changed.

      Reply
      • Alan Wilkinson

         /  9th June 2016

        The mob are calling for the judge’s appointment to be recalled and have pressured most of the venues the friend’s band plays at to cancel their contracts.

        I call that vile and disgraceful.

        Reply
      • Alan Wilkinson

         /  9th June 2016

        As for the sentence, the proper recourse is an appeal. End of story.

        Reply
  2. David

     /  9th June 2016

    Given the volume of BS, beat up, rape claims in US universities claiming to be representative of ‘rape culture of the white privileged’ that have turned out to be nothing more that pure lies, I’d wait a bit before casting any judgement.

    Reply
  3. Kevin

     /  9th June 2016

    Calling some drunken shenanigans “rape” just because one of the participants has a case of morning after regrets isn’t rape. Unfortunately people often do.

    But in this specific situation it’s clear that he raped her and I would go so far to say that if she was conscious at the time he would have used force (and from what I read he probably did).

    “happy-go-lucky self with that easygoing personality and welcoming smile”

    Yeah, right.

    Reply
  4. Kevin

     /  9th June 2016

    “Furthermore, those who reported coercing partners into sex – that is, raping them”

    Not true. For example if a man says to a woman “have sex with me or else I will tell your husband we did anyway” that’s coercion but not rape as she still has the choice not to have sex with him. Or if a guy nags a woman and she has pity sex with him just to shut him up, that’s coercion but again not rape.

    But sure, sometimes coercing someone into sex can be rape such as pointing a gun at their head.

    The danger is not “rape culture” but “rape victim” culture where men are unjustly labelled rapists just because the so-called victim had too much too drink.

    Reply
    • Kitty Catkin

       /  9th June 2016

      I agree that coercion isn’t by definition rape-and I have read that men are also nagged into doing it by their partners & do it to get some peace.

      Drinking oneself into unconsciousness is such risky behaviour that it’s a puzzle that so many still do it.

      We needed more details-were they out together drinking or did he find her there ? I’m guessing the former. Anyone who drinks so much that they are incapable is putting themselves in danger-it’s no good squawking that this shouldn’t be taken advantage of. It always has been and always will be.A passed out man with a wallet full of money shouldn’t be robbed, but I wouldn’t think that anyone would be too surprised if he was,

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  9th June 2016

        Oh, for goodness sake. Is it so unreasonable to think that people should not put themselves at risk ? Would you not wear a seatbelt because other drivers should drive carefully, so there should be no need for you to look after yourself ? Would you write your pin number on your card, because anyone finding it shouldn’t use it ? Would you walk up to a snarling pitbull because its owners should have trained it not to bite ?

        Saying that people should be able to do risky things because all other people should behave differently is childish. Most drivers are careful. Most people would hand in the card. Most people don’t train their dogs to bite. But there are the minority who are not like this.

        Reply
  5. Brown

     /  9th June 2016

    17 yo step daughter was watching this and we talked about it. From a dad’s perspective there were some lessons to be learned (but not in order of importance):
    – Don’t get falling down pissed – it shows a lack of self respect.
    – Don’t be loose with intimacy – it shows a lack of self respect.
    – Always look after yourself because you are the one thing that you can control.
    – Make friends, real friends, with people you can count on when you need someone.
    – Don’t expect people to treat you with respect when you have none for yourself – some will but they are increasingly rare and are labelled as out of touch or old fashioned.
    – Don’t expect people to do the right thing when you are at a disadvantage. Again some will but they are increasingly rare and are labelled as out of touch or old fashioned.
    – Don’t expect young men to act like men of old would have – its 2016 and innocence has long departed.
    – Bad things happen to stupid people.

    The idea of sex with someone drunk to the point of unconsciousness is completely unappealing to me so I think the guy is a mongrel for that alone but likewise how can she complain if she wasn’t conscious? This makes the issue of proof difficult.

    Lastly, some of the world’s biggest shits have become good educators when they repent and change. Not this guy yet perhaps but maybe one day.

    Reply
    • Gezza

       /  9th June 2016

      Good one, right on brother.

      Reply
      • Kitty Catkin

         /  9th June 2016

        I would differ on one thing-men (and women) of old were not all that different when the opportunity arose. Innocence has never been universal, or it still would be. People didn’t stop being innocent on a given date. I have read a lot of writings from other ages, and there was never, ever a time when this could be taken for granted. Human nature doesn’t change.

        Reply
        • Brown

           /  9th June 2016

          I disagree with this but, as usual, have no evidence to prove anything. While conceding that things happened in days gone as they do today by my reading of history around my grandfather and father’s generation showed me a far better standard of moral ethics than we would see now. My dad went and watched a Bob Hope show while in Guadalcanal (as far as I can determine) in about 1944 and he and the other Kiwi servicemen generally walked out because they found the jokes crude and show crass. He said the US guys loved it but I suspect they, being a bunch of young farm boys were as virgibnal as most of the Kiwis. Standards lower in wartime I guess but I get an impression that young men were generally kind, polite and well mannered. My mum, who was married with a daughter then, always thought the Marines in NZ were wonderful for those reasons.

          Reply
          • Gezza

             /  9th June 2016

            My mum, and as far as I can tell all her friends & pretty well all other women of her age, never ever drank enough to get totally blotto. I think that started with my generation, and even then a lot of the girls got blotto once & didn’t let themselves get like that again.

            Reply
            • Kitty Catkin

               /  9th June 2016

              I have read enough history to know that human nature doesn’t change in the basics. Things go in and out of fashion. Some of Jane Austen’s remarks seem rather crude and heartless now. A woman has a stillbirth-it must be because she happened to look at her husband without meaning to. A young Navy man dies. His mother’s grief is seen as distasteful because she is fat and fat people look ridiculous when they show this sort of emotion, and the young man was a drone who did the world a favour by dying.

              Some of the first films made were porn.Sigh. Before that, they had to use photos.

              I can well believe that Bob Hope was crude and crass-I have seen old films of shows put on for servicemen that were very crude and that would seem so now.

              The 50s ? 40s ? song ‘Have Some Madeira, M’dear.’ is still played. It’s about a dirty old man who gives a naive girl of 17 madeira to drink, rapes/has sex with her when she passes out and is in bed with her when she wakes up, saying ‘Have Some Madeira, M’dear.’

          • Kitty Catkin

             /  9th June 2016

            50s, and it’s described as a comic song. It’s not very funny, despite the witty wordplay, when one really listens to the words.

            There has never been a time when all young men were well-mannered; or all young women. One common theme in old magazines is how the current generation falls far short of the writers in this respect. I could show you writings from the c.19 that could have been written yesterday.

            Each generation tends to have a bit more opportunity than the one before, one could say.

            It doesn’t seem likely that people who are polite, well-mannered and considerate would bring their children up to be the opposite. The American servicemen were as inclined to be ‘only after one thing’ as anyone else, if people who were around then are to be believed. They had access to nylons-or some of them did-and yes, they expected something in return. Nylons were known as ‘Yank bait’. It was often assumed that a fur coat or something conspicuously luxurious had been paid for in kind. An old lady I knew remembered seeing a woman wearing a furcoat on the tram and hearing the remarks that were made about how she must have got it. I have read accounts of the unlucky people who had to clean the phonebooths in the war and what was found in them-the blackout meant that these were used as free hotel rooms, leaving the floors littered with used condoms. Gross.

            Then there was the Manners St stoush….

            A quote from a book of jokes from the time of WWI

            ‘She says that her uncle gave her those furs.’
            ‘Then either the furs or the uncle are not real.’

            Reply
  6. Nelly Smickers

     /  9th June 2016

    @11.09am

    Goodness!! I’ve only just realized that creep ‘Ian Connor’ mentioned in the post, had started following me on *twitter* 😮

    I think I’ll block him……..

    Reply
  7. Dave Kennedy

     /  9th June 2016

    ‘…..Or if a guy nags a woman and she has pity sex with him just to shut him up, that’s coercion but again not rape.’

    Phew, being married 20+ years, I’d forgotten it happened any other way

    Reply
    • Alan Wilkinson

       /  9th June 2016

      The distinctions between coercion, seduction and grooming are?

      Reply
      • Gezza

         /  9th June 2016

        Seduction involves frequent flowers, remembering anniversaries, frequent dinners out for just the two of you, cooking sometimes, listening & not telling them what you would do unless they ask. That sort of thing.

        Reply
      • Kevin

         /  9th June 2016

        Coercion, seduction, and grooming are all perfectly legal although often not always moral. “Grooming” often applies to preparing kids for sex but in that case it’s the actual having sex with kids that’s against the law, not the grooming bit, as far as I know. Although personally I think grooming kids for sex should be against the law in and of itself and obviously it should be.

        Reply
        • Kitty Catkin

           /  9th June 2016

          I don’t see how it could be, alas, except when it’s obviously that.

          Seduction is nothing like grooming or coercion.It doesn’t necessarily involve love, but it doesn’t involve pressure or force. Anyone who’s read Hardy’s Jude the Obscure (1895) will remember how his wife was talking to her friends about how he was slow about getting serious. They tell her to ask him around when her parents are out, lead him, make him follow her upstairs and then after an interval announce that she’s pregnant, as by the time a man found out that he’d been tricked into marriage there’d be nothing he could do about it.

          The wife first attracted Jude’s attention by throwing part of a butchered pig at him. Yes, that part.

          Reply
          • Kitty Catkin

             /  9th June 2016

            I would think that it would be all but impossible to make grooming a crime, or it would have been done. It’s so vague-it covers too much. Befriending someone in order to get at their children is despicable, but one couldn’t make it illegal to become friendly with any parents. If someone is asked to stand naked in front of a webcam and they don’t tell anyone, what could be done ? Nothing. Can someone be charged with asking this if it’s recorded ?

            Reply
          • Alan Wilkinson

             /  9th June 2016

            Grooming doesn’t intrinsically involve pressure or force as is obvious from its derivation. Coercion implies some kind of direct pressure but making someone want something is an art that involves a myriad of optional techniques.

            Reply
  8. Gezza

     /  9th June 2016

    His side of the story
    Brock Turner’s full statement is released

    http://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=11653665

    Reply
    • patupaiarehe

       /  9th June 2016

      Beat me to it G. Two sides to every story….

      Reply
      • Alan Wilkinson

         /  9th June 2016

        It seems a “he said/she said” situation. That’s why we have courts to test the evidence and try to figure out what can be proved beyond reasonable doubt and pass judgements accordingly. Short circuiting that process makes losers of us all.

        Reply
    • Kevin

       /  10th June 2016

      Hi account reads like it was written in a lawyer’s office.

      Her account is practically useless as she drank so much she can’t remember a thing.

      His account has so many holes you can drain spaghetti with it.

      The only reliable witnesses are the guys who saw him on top of her when she was unconscious. They’re pretty much independent so we can safely say they’re telling the truth when they say she was unconscious which is pretty much central to this case.

      And that’s what the jury found. Because given she was unconscious then it’s a simple case of rape because an unconscious person is incapable of giving consent except retrospectively (e.g. “The really hot girl tried to have sex with me? Damn, I was so drunk I must have been unconscious”).

      The only spanner is whether or not he knew what he was doing was wrong. Jury found he did. The fact that the booze would have affected his judgement goes towards mitigation which obviously it did, given the very light sentence.

      Reply
  9. Alan Wilkinson

     /  9th June 2016

    The law assumes that the feelings of men who want sex don’t matter and those of women who don’t completely outweigh them. That a raped woman suffers far more than a rejected man. Yet men suicide three times more often than women. Are women simply more vocal about their feelings and their needs?

    Reply
    • Gezza

       /  9th June 2016

      You may be best to ask a raped man about this Alan.

      Reply
      • Alan Wilkinson

         /  9th June 2016

        Good answer, Gezza, but it doesn’t explain the suicide rates.

        Reply
        • Gezza

           /  9th June 2016

          Two separate issues, Alan.

          Men suicide three times more often than women. Are women simply more vocal about their feelings and their needs?

          No simple answer. I think that’s probably a significant contributor – they may not tell people how they are feeling so there’s no intervention. One of the main reasons suicides by men are higher is that they choose more lethal ways of killing themselves, women will overdose and survive. Men are more likely to use a gun or hang themselves etc. There’s no coming back from it.

          http://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2012/09/24/the-gender-inequality-of-suicide-why-are-men-at-such-high-risk/#8dd26f222f39

          https://www.theguardian.com/science/2015/jan/21/suicide-gender-men-women-mental-health-nick-clegg

          http://www.bcmj.org/articles/silent-epidemic-male-suicide

          Reply
          • Alan Wilkinson

             /  9th June 2016

            That’s a circular argument though – those who choose more lethal methods are determined, those who don’t are just making a statement.

            Reply
            • Gezza

               /  9th June 2016

              Not necessarily. I have a friend who’s a pharmacist. She says people who overdose (and this is primarily women) often take large doses of drugs that won’t actually kill them, and sometimes pass out before they have taken enough of the ones that could. They get discovered in time to be treated in hospital and recover. By then the psych people have swung in to action & many of them regret it anyway when they see the horrified reaction of their loved ones.

            • Alan Wilkinson

               /  9th June 2016

              I’m unconvinced. That is what they do, not why they do it.

            • Gezza

               /  9th June 2016

              Usually I understand what you’re saying but you’ve got me stumped on this one. The thread’s about someone being convicted & sentenced for rape. You’re now apparently linking men’s suicide rates with it in some way I can’t fathom. You appear to be suggesting it’s because women verbalise about it more that they don’t suicide at the same rates. Perhaps some are making a statement.

              How & why does it matter? Where are you trying to go with this?

            • Kevin

               /  10th June 2016

              @Gezza

              ” I have a friend who’s a pharmacist. She says people who overdose (and this is primarily women) often take large doses of drugs that won’t actually kill them, and sometimes pass out before they have taken enough of the ones that could. ”

              That possibly helps explain the difference between male and female suicide rates. Girls are more likely to try and kill themselves using drugs and are therefore more likely to fail. Those “suicides” don’t get reported hence the difference.

              In other words girls are just as likely to want to kill themselves as guys. Guys are just better at it.

            • Alan Wilkinson

               /  10th June 2016

              @Gezza, I don’t see why that was difficult to understand. You don’t know why women choose unsuccessful suicide methods. An obvious reason is that they are dramatically “calling for help” rather than intending to kill themselves.

              Look here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_differences_in_suicide

              Male/Female suicide ratios are high in Western countries which emphasise female rights.

              @Kevin, males kill themselves at 3.5 times the rate of females in NZ but females self-harm at only 1.8 times the rate of males. The ratio of males to females is greatest for the least deprived sectors, again in which female rights are greatest.

              Unfortunately the data does not identify male/female ratios by method of suicide or self-harm.

              http://www.health.govt.nz/publication/suicide-facts-deaths-and-intentional-self-harm-hospitalisations-2011 and the spreadsheet it links.

            • patupaiarehe

               /  10th June 2016

              @ Alan
              Nobody can argue with the facts. What interests me is how we got here. Or more to the point, how you lead us here……..

          • Gezza

             /  10th June 2016

            It’s not the figures or the fact men succeed at suicide more often than women I’m puzzled about, Alan – it’s what on earth you’re trying to say in respect of the topic?

            What has (from your first comment above) … [the law assuming] “that the feelings of men who want sex don’t matter and those of women who don’t completely outweigh them. That a raped woman suffers far more than a rejected man” … got to do with the fact that more men kill themselves than women?

            Reply
            • Alan Wilkinson

               /  10th June 2016

              It’s fairly obvious from the rape statistics if nothing else that men have a much stronger sex drive than women. I think it is a reasonable hypothesis that sexual frustration makes many men unhappy and inclined to suicide. Certainly there is evidence that a good sex life is beneficial to physical and mental health. I think women have been very effective in promoting their right to say no and portraying their suffering caused by rape, sometimes to the extent of quite extreme definitions of rape and sexual abuse. I am just questioning whether both sides of the issue have been properly examined. I don’t think the suicide imbalance has yet been properly analysed. Obviously men are dying from it a lot more often than women are dying from rape yet no-one seems to notice.

            • Gezza

               /  10th June 2016

              I think it is a reasonable hypothesis that sexual frustration makes many men unhappy and inclined to suicide.

              I dunno about that – in fact I think you’re really straining credibility here. Neither time I considered suicide had anything to do with sexual frustration. A solution to most men’s sexual frustration is in their hands. I really think you’re barking up a wrong tree here Alan.

              Obviously men are dying from it a lot more often than women are dying from rape yet no-one seems to notice.
              That could be because there’s no need to think there’s a link.

            • patupaiarehe

               /  10th June 2016

              Yes G, exactly. I’m struggling to make the link myself….

    • Kevin

       /  10th June 2016

      “The law assumes that the feelings of men who want sex don’t matter and those of women who don’t completely outweigh them”

      Goes towards mitigation. For example if a woman plays a guy for her own ego and then tells him to get lost at the last minute and he reacts by forcing himself on her the judge may see fit to give him a lighter sentence under the circumstances.

      It’s still rape though and he’s still a rapist.

      Reply
      • Alan Wilkinson

         /  10th June 2016

        That just confirms my observation. The mitigation is because the woman’s objection is compromised, not because the man’s desires are validated.

        Reply

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